Untitled

There are sparks in my blankets and flashes behind my eyes and storms in my stomach and I can't sleep again. I can't cry but the nightmares are back, reminding me of everything I do wrong and leaving me with a sense of oceandeep loss when I wake. There are new people disappointed in me every night and I always do something to lose them.

There is hope on the horizon, I swear. I know that I will be okay in time, but I don't know how long it will take and I am not okay right now.

I wish I could cry and get it over with.
I just...
I was doing so well.